Broken Spirit

The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God. ~Psalm 51:17


God is dealing with me.  This shouldn't be a surprise to me.  I asked Him to help me.  I just didn't want to pick up the phone and listen when He called.

I struggle.  I struggle as a man, a real man.  I allowed things into my life that have no business there.  Some have resided for well over three decades.  Others are much more recent.  I am no longer allowing residence in my life to these destructive things.  Today...with God's grace, is eviction day.

What I have allowed into my mind changed my behavior.  It changed the way I perceived reality.  It affect me.  It affect those around me.  Those things allowed my past to keep me broken.  Keep me shackled.  Keep me in pain.

God does not want that from me.  He wants my broken places and my hurt from my past healed and redeemed; for good, forever.

I make no conclusions that this is going to be easy or quick; although I do believe God can work very quickly.  I know I MUST allow Him to cleanse me.  I must let Him work, in His time.  I submit to God and all He has for me.

I ask as you read, pray.  Pray that His voice never leaves my heart and my mind.
I am learning you can't do this alone.  This thing called life.  You HAVE to ask for help.  We were never put here to walk the tough roads alone.  I also am learning that you can't keep things hidden.  That God wants the dirty and dark brought to the Light.  That's the only way healing happens.  You have to have those around you to hold you accountable; other men who will ask you the hard questions.  They are sent from God.  

Ultimately, I have learned this: God DOES listen, every..single..time.  Keep crying out.  Keep praying.  He hears and IS working.  And that I'm loved.

Dean